The Reality of Life is Death

Years ago this wise man once told me,

In a typical mater-of fact way,

That in my life that all of my choices,

Left me here where I am standing today.

He told me that everyone will choose to

Be exactly where they want to be.

And precisely at any given moment,

What & where I am is totally up to me.

Looking back now I guess he was right then.

And my choices have led me to here.

My paths were so different and not perfect,

But there definitely was no “puppeteer”.

“Either live without lies or die alone man”.

This choice showed the path I must take.

My decision was my own, and I made it alone,

And my life was never even close to fake.

But this has now brought me to know disappointment,

A sensation that’s new to my soul.

So I desperately reached out to friends then,

But they were busy with their life and their goal.

Just a phone call or simple,”what’s up friend?”

May have altered this course of events.

“Hey Frank, I think now that I get it,

I can see how I caused you to resent”

You told me the problems you were facing,

And you asked me to help with your fight.

I knew all the factors, but I chose her again,

So all alone there you died in the night.

With MY friends I never shared this truth though.

I guess that I still wanted my pride.

So I hinted and I wished and I pushed them,

But I failed badly with everything I tried.

My message was missed over and over again,

As they dutifully went on with their days.

Deep down though I know I can’t blame them,

Who the fuck wants to deal with my craze.

So all alone I have made my last choice now.

Not to fade somewhere lying in a bed,

But to go out just the way I had lived life,

Gaining some revenge is where I am led.

So with sadness I wish friends farewell now,

As I leave for my next glorious quest.

I am choosing the path I was meant for,

While knowing meeting you has left me so blessed.

All the words that I’ve read were so touching,

And I loved all of the care that you’ve shown.

I hope those words that you wrote so politely

Will be written on my final tombstone.